Crap RP

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester goes into a kitchen and walks around the appliances and lobs a grenade in each and every one of them. They all go off in a glorious fashion spraying the area with shrapnel and food particles.

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: asshole i wanted to raid his fridge first

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester: All he had in there were ingredients for chili dogs and condiments.
Sylvester kicks a half seared package of ground beef into the air and shoots it with a shotgun.

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: ew chilidogs are gross

riku uravae smashes an antique chinese vase

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester makes his way to the dining room and swings on the chandelier like a rope swing. It pulls all of the cables out from the ceiling and causes the room above the collapse, filling the room with debris.

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: don't die

[Pufflehugs]

Name: Dash the Hedgehog
Gender: Male
Age: Eight
Species: Hedgehog
Alignment: Chaotic Good
likes: Chili dogs, the Nintendo DSi, his dad, being a HERO
hates: Eggman, people who disrespect his dad
Description: The secret son of Sonic and Amy!? Acts like Jaleel Sonic but more serious.
Character Photo (MANDATORY):

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: hey, sylvester ?

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester throws a bathtub that fell on top of him.
Sylvester: What is it, assbag? Can't you see I'm busy here?

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: maybe it's me having my daily delusions but i think someone might be here that isn't amy or eggman

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester: I call BS. This place is empty as **** and there's fire stretching on for miles and miles outside.

[Pufflehugs]

Dash the Hedgehog walks in, with Sonic's blue Piko-Piko Hammer from the Sonic Advance games (pictured)

Spoiler:

There it is, that's the hammer.

Dash: Hey, who are you guys?

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: i'm riku and i might be from kingdom hearts, hi

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester turns around and aims one of his guns straight ahead, only to have to look down and adjust his aim.
Sylvester: We're tax collectors.

[Pufflehugs]

Dash: I don't know what that is, but you're smashing all of this stuff, and that's not very nice.

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester: We don't take joy in doing this. Maybe if SOMEBODY paid their debts we wouldn't be here right now.
Sylvester shoots a wall ornament off the wall.

[Pufflehugs]

Dash: I still don't know what that means, but if you're being forced to do this, then you must work for Eggman!

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: um by the way, are you amy's kid? i assume sonic is your dad then right?

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester: Wait, does that mean this is Snowy? Damn I thought he'd be taller than this.

[Pufflehugs]

Dash: Yeah, Sonic is my dad.

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: eggman is banging your mom

[CasualCollision]

Sylvester kneels to the child's level and speaks to him face to face.
Sylvester: Here's the situation. Your dad's missing in action, and all this collateral damage we're doing isn't going to pay off all of his debts. And because your mother is a ****, that leaves you the responsibility until further notice.

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: that's a harsh reality we face

[Pufflehugs]

Dash: I still have no idea what either of you Eggman goons are trying to say, but I don't think it's good!

[Vaporwave]

riku uravae: i have nothing to do with eggman, i am just a servant to a cruel, cold world and can only hope that i don't die alone