spooky scary skeletons

[chocohugs]

an old thing I wrote like a year ago, found it today and cleaned it up + finished it. I'm certainly no writer and it's 2am so there are bound be grammatical errors and general mediocrity. sorry if any cussing got past the censors

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"You're bullshitting me, right?"

Alex hopped over in my direction and plopped down the homemade ouija board in front of the both of us before throwing me a sideways pout. "C'mon , get in the spirit of the club already! We're here to have spooooooooky ghost adventures, and you better damn well believe we're gonna do it!" She punctuated her thought by sticking her tongue out, which gave me a chance to steal a glance at the tiny metallic stud tucked into the middle of it. I still hadn't quite gotten used to the incongruence between her appearance and her personality--she appeared to be the sort of punk kid you would expect to see some sort of light bondage gear at some shady store without having the self awareness to be embarrassed about it. Upon her face laid caked on dark makeup with short black hair to frame it. The multiple piercings and the reversed cross hanging from a small silver chain around her neck didn't necessarily help the image either. Along with her typical all black ensemble, it's no wonder why most normal people would dread any sort of interaction with her. Unfortunately, her mannerisms betrayed all that: her attitude matched that of a small animal hosed up on cocaine; it made talking to her a chore in a completely different way.

I sighed. There was no point in trying to reason with her so instead I glanced down at the cheap piece of cardboard sitting in front of me. It consisted of: the alphabet (Letters A-P, picking up again at letters S-V), yes and no, a happy and sad face, hello and goodbye, along with pictures of a puppy, a tree, and a lamp. I could tell I was in for a real treat tonight; things still managed to surprise me in the worst of ways in this place. I took my eyes off the ****** excuse for a piece of paranormal equipment and directed my attention towards one of the club founders. "Hey, uh, I think you missed a couple of letters there, champ. And what are these pictures for, exactly?"

The young man in my line of sight looked straight through me with glazed, half-lidded eyes. Creepy as ****. There was an awkward period of silence during which I had assumed he had gone comatose directly before me. I briefly wondered if I would be accounted responsible for his injuries. Would I have to pay his medical bills? ****. He spoke suddenly, jolting me out of my stupor. Slowly and methodically, the words came to him, "The spirits......have no need for such symbols." ...And they have need for a lamp and a ****** puppy dog? I wanted to yell at him, but I just barely repressed myself. Patience was the key to dealing with this guy, and I clearly didn't have what it took. Ignoring me, he adjusted his entire body to turn back to the side it started on and began quietly murmuring to the thin air before him.

This amazing use of human resources' name was Ryan, and the empty molecules of oxygen he was speaking to was his "girlfriend", Trish. He was tall in stature, larger than both Alex and I, but thinner than the both of us as well. He always had some sort of faraway look in his glassy eyes, leaving what sort of drugs he could possibly be on up to your own imagination. I could tell he had obviously neglected taking a shower within the past few days, as his hair shined with grease from under his beanie and I absentmindedly noticed he was wearing the same clothes he had been in yesterday. ****** nasty. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Alex nervously study the both of us. In an effort to reaffirm a guise of friendliness, she hastefully suggested,"Well, let's get this thing started!" There was a slight pause as we both redirected our attention towards her, but soon enough we placed our hands on the overturned shot glass that acted as our planchette. "What should we ask first?"

"Its name?" I suggested.

"WHAT...IS...YOUR...NAME?" Alex repeated, except 20 times more slowly and loudly.

"What the ****?" I sneered. "I'm pretty sure the spirit isn't retarded or anything." At this, Alex glared at me. Ryan even offered a passing glance. I averted my eyes.

Unsurprisingly, the planchette didn't budge an inch. We continued to ask questions. How old are you? Where are you from? Are you a good spirit? A bad spirit? Are you male or female? What is your favorite color? What are your political views? Your stance on Obamacare? How do you feel about dubstep? The list goes on. At some point I decided I would rather kill myself right here and now and answer these inane questions myself. But by the time I came to that decision, Ryan spoke up and asked his first question of the night. "Did you have any pets?" Slowly but surely, I felt the planchette shift beneath us until it rested on top of the crudely drawn dog. Inwardly, I **** my pants. My gaze jumped to meet Ryan's and he gave me only what I could assume to be the closest thing to a ****-eating grin that he's capable of. I snapped my head around to look at Alex only to see that she'd given me the same look. Cocky *************.

In an effort to show the both of them up, I cleared my throat and asked my own question. "What was its name?" The planchette hesitated, and then moved to the frowny face. I furrowed my eyebrows. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"I don't think it likes you," Alex guessed, donning her own confused look.

"Why would it have any reason to dislike me?"

Alex and Ryan exchanged their own knowing looks. I silently fumed, my rage burning only hotter as the planchette hovered over "yes".

In a fit of anger, I flipped the entire board off the table. It probably wasn't my greatest moment, but **** that ghost, seriously. Alex gaped at me, only for a moment, absolutely dumbfounded. And then she bursted out laughing. My face heated up and I looked at Ryan for help only to see that he'd turned away from me, covering his mouth in what I could assume to be an attempt at hiding his laughter. I quickly brushed down my shirt, as if social embarrassment had dirtied it, and then got up out of the hard edged school chair. "WELP," I choked out, "NICE SPENDING TIME WITH YOU GUYS. I THINK I'LL BE LEAVING NOW."

"Wait!" In between fits of laughter, Alex had somehow composed herself enough to cough out that single word and latch onto my wrist before I could walk away. She wiped the newly-formed tears out of her eyes and took a deep breath or two before asking, "Are you gonna make it to the next meeting?"

I scowled. "Yeah."

[retrolinkx]

Thread Music.

[eblu]

^
i hate you for that and then some more

[Crash32]

argh RETRO
i turned it up a little because of the song but YEP